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03-08-2024, 12:12 PM | #1365 |
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A few jokes from the internet about us older folks
What’s the secret to having a smoking hot body as a senior? Cremation. I used to know a couple who grew fruit trees together. They lived to a ripe old age. Old age makes us great multitaskers. Why, I can sneeze and pee at the same time. One benefit of old age is that your secrets are always safe with your friends… because they can’t remember them. Stop thinking of them as “hot flashes.” Think of them as your inner child playing with matches. Now that I’ve gotten older, everything’s finally starting to click for me. My knees, my back, my neck… I called the incontinence hotline recently. They asked if I could hold.
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03-09-2024, 04:58 AM | #1367 |
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People will be shocked when they discover how bad an electrician I am.
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Wha' da ya mean? No brakes never stopped anyone before!
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03-11-2024, 01:16 PM | #1368 |
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03-11-2024, 02:07 PM | #1369 |
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Posts Drives: 2022 M850 GC - Carbon Black Join Date: Feb 2017
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03-11-2024, 02:10 PM | #1370 |
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What do electricians call a power outage?
A current event.
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03-13-2024, 11:21 AM | #1373 |
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Why did the electrician get killed in a debate?
They say he used conductive reasoning. |
03-14-2024, 09:44 AM | #1375 |
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Well I missed y'all a latte and can’t espresso how excited I am! The Jaguar F pace dream ended. The F pace forum was dry anyway. I went back to a BMW last week... life is hectic so will log in when I can. You well? Hope so.
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03-14-2024, 11:07 AM | #1376 |
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Wait, we have to own a BMW to post????
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I have romped on her and I giggled like a drunk infant the entire time. - Sedan_Clan
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03-17-2024, 05:43 PM | #1378 |
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A man and his young wife were in divorce court, but the custody of their children posed a problem. The mother gets up and says to the judge that since she brought the children into this world, she should retain custody of them. The man also wanted custody of his children, so the judge asked for his justification. After a long silence, the man slowly rose from his chair and replied, "Your Honor, when I put a dollar in a vending machine and a Coke comes out, does the Coke belong to me or the machine?"
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03-18-2024, 02:12 PM | #1379 |
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Some St. Paddy's Day jokes:
What is a leprechaun’s favorite type of music? Sham-rock ‘n’ roll. What do you call an Irish spider? Paddy long legs. What do you call a fake Irish diamond? A shamrock. When is an Irish potato not an Irish potato? When it’s a French fry. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Erin. Erin who? Erin as fast as I could, but I couldn’t catch the leprechaun. How can you tell if an Irishman is having a good time? He's Dublin over with laughter.
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03-19-2024, 08:35 AM | #1381 |
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There was a snake crawling out of my face last night.
The good news is that I killed it. The bad news is that I need a new CPAP hose. |
03-19-2024, 08:48 AM | #1382 | |
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Quote:
I raise my hand to hit it but missed aim and hit my balls instead. Aaaasrgh....The mosquito must have LOL. |
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