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      12-19-2018, 12:30 PM   #1717
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Not_Judy View Post
How is this for a confession....I'm currently shopping for rubber sheets on amazon.
This is a much better confession. Make sure you have your phone within arms reach so you can let us know if she ignores your safe word...
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      12-19-2018, 01:29 PM   #1718
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Darth One View Post
This is a much better confession. Make sure you have your phone within arms reach so you can let us know if she ignores your safe word...
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We're Americans. Leave your logic and science witchcraft out of this! Jesus and guns are all we need.
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      12-19-2018, 02:06 PM   #1719
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Not_Judy View Post
I'm currently shopping for rubber sheets on amazon.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Darth One View Post
This is a much better confession. Make sure you have your phone within arms reach so you can let us know if she ignores your safe word...
I know it sounds like Darth One cares from his post, but I just wanted to advise you that if said situation were to occur, and you called him, all you would hear on the other line was hysterical laughter and then a dial tone.

Pretty much ditto for BP in general if you were to post your woes here.

Best to call 911 first. The very next thing you should do before stopping the bleeding would be to let us know. Then you can focus on fashioning tourniquets out of whatever you can reach.
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      12-19-2018, 02:29 PM   #1720
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
focus on fashioning tourniquets out of whatever you can reach.
I'm sure said tourniquets will be fashioned from from rubber bed sheets.
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We're Americans. Leave your logic and science witchcraft out of this! Jesus and guns are all we need.
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      12-19-2018, 02:39 PM   #1721
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Not_Judy View Post
I'm sure said tourniquets will be fashioned from from rubber bed sheets.
I don't know - something tells me rubber sheets do not tear into strips easily...
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      12-19-2018, 02:46 PM   #1722
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Joekerr View Post
I don't know - something tells me rubber sheets do not tear into strips easily...
You said whatever you can reach as in proximity, not close as in material with low structural integrity. At least I can wrap myself in them and save the flooring in my home on the way to the ER looking like the gimp from Pulp Fiction.
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We're Americans. Leave your logic and science witchcraft out of this! Jesus and guns are all we need.
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      12-19-2018, 03:04 PM   #1723
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Not_Judy View Post
um, no. The liquid we currently have an abundance of is not urine.
She a squirter?
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      12-19-2018, 03:06 PM   #1724
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Isnt that just piss
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      12-19-2018, 03:07 PM   #1725
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Never experienced it, only seen in pron... but that's what they say.
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      12-19-2018, 03:10 PM   #1726
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I've experienced but didnt care to do a taste test
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      12-19-2018, 03:32 PM   #1727
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 1MOREMOD View Post
Isnt that just piss
It isn't actually. There is a great debate over it, but I can assure you that it isn't. BTW, they are all squirters if you know what you're doing.
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We're Americans. Leave your logic and science witchcraft out of this! Jesus and guns are all we need.
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      12-19-2018, 07:41 PM   #1728
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I dont find out and just give them a facial before they realize what happened
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      12-23-2018, 10:56 AM   #1729
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i realized i'm that asshole who says "happy holidays" so as to not deal with anyone being offended when all the lovely salespeople say "merry christmas"
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      12-23-2018, 11:35 AM   #1730
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke View Post
i realized i'm that asshole who says "happy holidays" so as to not deal with anyone being offended when all the lovely salespeople say "merry christmas"
That's what it took for you to realize you're an asshole???
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      12-23-2018, 10:46 PM   #1731
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Every Christmas, when I am home alone I take an exacto knife and surgically unwrap some of my presents.
This year, in my new house with my new bride, was no different. I decided to open the presents from my wife's family.
They got me a PS VR with some VR games...
I have no interest in the VR nor have the time for video games. Not sure how to go about asking for a receipt to return all of this that I won't bother opening up.
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      12-24-2018, 07:23 AM   #1732
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i'll take it
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      12-24-2018, 09:31 AM   #1733
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You have to open it to know? Normally I just pick it up and tell them what they got me. Began long ago with a box of shotgun shells, that was SO easy yet they thought I had magical powers or something.
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      12-24-2018, 10:08 AM   #1734
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Quote:
Originally Posted by UncleWede View Post
You have to open it to know? Normally I just pick it up and tell them what they got me. Began long ago with a box of shotgun shells, that was SO easy yet they thought I had magical powers or something.
Get a box of shotgun shells as a gift, and you can go rob someone for the things you really want
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      12-24-2018, 09:48 PM   #1735
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After talking about it with my cousin I came up with a plan to return and keeping everyone happy.

I am just going to say that I get really dizzy after playing for more than 30 minutes.
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      12-24-2018, 10:03 PM   #1736
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Darth One View Post
Get a box of shotgun shells as a gift, and you can go rob someone for the things you really want
What, you just aim a shell at them?

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      03-23-2019, 10:41 AM   #1737
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Watching a Hallmark movie a summer to remember and enjoying it.
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      03-23-2019, 10:50 AM   #1738
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