Saying goodbye to our dog

[Our03z4]

Our little buddies time seems to be coming to an end. Back in December our 12 yr old pup had an immediate splenectomy to stay alive as he had a ruptured tumor. He was given only a 50/50 chance of making it through the surgery but pulled through even with having 2 strokes right after. He was then diagnosed after testing with Hemangiosarcoma (an aggressive and fast spreading type of blood cancer, worst thing a dog can have). This causes him to have occasional internal bleeds.

Most days he's been great, almost puppy like again, but in the last few weeks he's been getting worse. He was originally given 1-4 months to live but he has passed that which has given my wife lots of hope. I will admit I thought the right plan instead of surgery was to be put down. The vet advised no surgery due to the cost $8k (long stay and being a weekend surgery) combined with the low survival rate. This still seems crazy to me but I understand my wife's choice.

Fast forward and the last 3 days have been horrible, the poor guy is barely hanging on and my sweet wife is having a terribly rough time. This dog means the world to her, their personality's are so much alike and they have done dog agility and dock diving competitions together. She is also his world, no matter how bad off he is he always lights up when he sees her, even during his ICU stay. My wife is basically not sleeping and is crying so much it is breaking my heart, I just don't know what to do. I keep trying to gently be the voice of reason and that maybe the time has come, this isn't healthy for her or maybe in the best interest for him. We don't have any children so this is our version.

I'm going the 1st thing in the morning to pick him up another type of med that may help the bleeding.

Any advice?

[gtr2M3]

That’s terribly sad, we had to put our 2 dogs down at the same time last year and it was hard but you have to ask yourself if you’re keeping him going for your own benefit. If his quality of life is that poor, I’m sure he’s tired, very tired

I would highly recommend having a vet come to your home if the time has come. It’s the best thing for your pup and you can take comfort in knowing that.

So sorry to hear the failing health. I wish pets could talk and tell us what they want

[LaVitaEBella]

It is so hard to see our good companion go. It took me years to get a new dog after the first one died. It's different, they are not just pets for most of us they are family. Sorry to hear about it.

[leopard print]

I’m so sorry to hear this. I don’t have any advice, but all I could do is wish you the best. My pup is honestly my best friend and I can’t imagine what you and your wife are going through right now.

Stay strong brotha.

[Tuxedo]

On Tuesday we had our mobile Vet come over and assist our beloved Sammy over the rainbow to see Dorothy and Toto. To say it has been a tough week both before and after the procedure is an understatement. We shared our home for 15yrs 11days of love filled wonderful, impossible to unweave our lives during that time. She raised the kids and this Husband to booot, this is like losing a child or sibling.

We also were on extended medically her life 3-4times over and she passed out pooping, clearly the pain she was having made our very difficult decision needed. I look at it this way, when it's time to die the fail point cells sends out a signal time to die. We made the decision to intervene and prevent those cells medically multiple times well over a year ago. There comes a point our selfish desire to keep her companionship by preventing the time to die at bay becomes almost evil instead of humane.

Once your beloved is suffering to that level, it hurts, it hurts so much but best you can do is let them go. Cry the tears, grieve and embrace others hurting too.

Love you Sammy

[twin fed]

It is always difficult, but more often then not, it is in their best interest. My condolences, I know how hard it is. We had to put down two dogs within a year of each other. It took us about a year to move on and decide that it was time to start over. Just 3 weeks ago we got our second inside a year and it is so wonderful to have two puppies in the house again. All the best in your time of loss.

[cfm56d7b]

My deepest condolences. Losing a family member is an incredibly difficult and painful process.

Two ounces of joy will easily outweigh 1 ton of grief. Start searching for a new dog and the amount of joy you will receive from the new member of the family will be exactly the right medicine.

[Bonk!]

...but take your time. It took us years to get over the loss of our rescue Buddi. We knew when we were ready, 12 years ago, and (then puppy) Sophie became the center of our lives (followed by her 6 year old rescue sister Stella!). That said, I sill miss Buddi every day.

[bosstones]

I'm really sorry to hear/read this. Is the pup hurting badly w/ no or little reprieve? Do the meds have significant side effects that make your pup not themself? If so, and your pup does not seem content or at ease, it is time for your furry friend to move on. Like with people, it's all about quality of life. They'll never forget you nor you them and the memories forged and time together should be cherished and not tainted by prolonging any suffering the pup is going through. It's hard on them as well as you and your wife.

I know this is a tough one, though, and it is easy to play arm chair quarterback. We had a big scare this whole weekend with one of our dogs and worried his time had prematurely come. Thankfully, it did not but it was a sobering reminder of how finite time is.

I wish you all the best in this tough time.

[Rahul718]

OP, I could have wrote that post myself. I too had a black lab who died of hemangiosarcoma. It really is the worst kind of cancer for a dog. We had his spleen removed but it sadly was not enough. The vet was brutally honest and said nothing could really help him at this time. I tried all sorts of remedies… homeopathic and CBD oil with the help of “dosage doctors” for this kind of stuff. What a huge scam now that I look back at it. It got so bad that one day he was sitting in the driveway while I was washing my car and when I told him to go inside with me he wasn’t able to move. But at the same time he did whatever he could to make us all smile despite the pain he was in.

That night at 12:30am we went to our vet to do what needed to be done. My wife, my dad and my mom all went. “Pepsi” died in my arms and not an hour goes by where I don’t think of him and this was 3 years ago. My advice to you is not to fight it. This is THE worst cancer for dogs and the moment you see your buddy in pain is when you know it’s time. At least for me holding him in my arms as he passed was a moment I’ll never forget and I’m glad it was me and no one else

[Marmugmotleocay]

OP, I'm very sorry for your loss. Dogs are the best creation from God. I always have Rottweilers and their life is short. Some of my buddies had to be put down at a young age for different health issues. Every time I tell myself no more dogs but the lack of their presence is overwhelming. Im sitting here looking at my 7 year old Cayman and 2 year old Bimmer and Im so happy they are here.

[M5Rick]

Dogs go and too often, our black 'n tan min dachshund Jasper passed on sofa two years ago at 14.6 yo. He waited for me to coming back from somewhere then passed away peacefully, couldn't accept it and almost immediately we got another baby tan miniature from Warsaw as it was unbearable.

[Tommy-G]

My wife is a Veterinary hospital manager and I dont know how she does it. She has been in the industry since early 90's.
The only thing she ever said to make me understand was if she is able to help/save one animal then it was one animal that may not have made it.

Sorry for everyone in here who has experienced losses and the OP. Its never any easier regardless of how long they are with us.

[CTinline-six]

I had to put down my 17 year old border collie last month. It was getting to the point where he couldn't stand up anymore. I got him when he was a puppy, and he had been by my side through many tough things in life, always waiting for me when I got home. It was probably one of the most difficult things I've had to do.

[fbiiii]

Thats aweful mate, sorry to hear

[Our03z4]

Thank you ALL for the nice comments and advice. He seems to have pulled through somehow once again. My wife and I had a conversation that if these stay being more frequent (once every 2 weeks) we will have him put down. This last one was rough but starting today you would never know. Fully back to his oldself and acting like a pup, we are actually having to calm him down. That's the most difficult part about this, he'll be in terrible shape and then in a few days back in great shape for another few weeks.

Thanks again everyone, I'll keep this updated.

[Torgus]

If the animal is in pain and there is no hope of FULL recovery put it down. It sounds like you are just trying to keep it alive for yourself/your wife. It sucks but it is the right thing to do. I just watched my inlaws dog die in front of all of us on the 5th of July. Not fun.

[DocL]

Fuck this. I had to go through letting two dogs go four years ago. It's the goddam worst thing. But, and you have to remember this, please don't keep the pup alive for your sentiment. If you know it's bad and the dog has to be hospitalized again, then that is the time to proceed with the euthanasia. Right now it's obvious the dog is reacting to the meds that were just provided. When I got the call by my vet that my dog had an inoperable cancer and I went to see her, she was acting just like her old self. My vet said it was pain meds. Ah fuck, I'm starting to cry right now. And well, he said the dignified thing to do is let her go. So right there my wife and I held her and she crossed the rainbow bridge. This was four years ago and I still miss her every day. Then six months later we lost our other dog.

I feel your pain and I'm so sorry you have to go through this right now.

Hang in there. And remember, we all have one "great" pet companion no matter what anyone says about another dog filling the void. Yes, it's good to get another, but you truly know which dog was the great one after you have had to lose a few like I have.

RIP Vegas. I still miss you everyday.

[Our03z4]

Originally Posted by Torgus

If the animal is in pain and there is no hope of FULL recovery put it down. It sounds like you are just trying to keep it alive for yourself/your wife. It sucks but it is the right thing to do. I just watched my inlaws dog die in front of all of us on the 5th of July. Not fun.

He is tearing it up today, super happy and playful. That's the problem, he'll have a rough day or two but then weeks or months of living great again. I would have put him down the day of the surgery, I'm with ya on him not suffering. The vet said he isn't in actual pain, not that kind of cancer currently since the spleen was removed. It's more of an energy zapper. Our other dog is 14 and in perfect health but still sleeps more than the dog with cancer, so go figure I guess.

I'm just happy my wife is on the same page now it seems, like I said next time he has an issue will be the time. Before these last 2 spells (about 4 days total) he went 5 months with no issues at all.

Sorry for your inlaws loss!

[Our03z4]

Originally Posted by bosstones

I'm really sorry to hear/read this. Is the pup hurting badly w/ no or little reprieve? Do the meds have significant side effects that make your pup not themself? If so, and your pup does not seem content or at ease, it is time for your furry friend to move on. Like with people, it's all about quality of life. They'll never forget you nor you them and the memories forged and time together should be cherished and not tainted by prolonging any suffering the pup is going through. It's hard on them as well as you and your wife.

I know this is a tough one, though, and it is easy to play arm chair quarterback. We had a big scare this whole weekend with one of our dogs and worried his time had prematurely come. Thankfully, it did not but it was a sobering reminder of how finite time is.

I wish you all the best in this tough time.

Thank you for the kind post! No real pain at this time. No side effects from the meds either.

[BMWGUYinCO]

OMG we just had to put our beloved dog Sulley down on Saturday, July 3rd.

He was an exceptional dog - Australian Shepherd/Beagle mix, incredibly intelligent and we've been gutted since. So many people came over who knew him and offered their sympathies - no kidding even his vet of 11 years cried because of his personality. I'm not even sure when my wife will recover.

He was 11.5 years old and this just happened like a light switch - up until 2 weeks ago he was his completely happy self, then the decline happened so quickly. It was cancer - it started on his liver and spleen and travelled to his lungs and brain, all within 6 months.

To everyone who has lost their pet - my sincere sympathies. I now know what it's like.

[DocL]

Originally Posted by BMWGUYinCO

OMG we just had to put our beloved dog Sulley down on Saturday, July 3rd.

He was an exceptional dog - Australian Shepherd/Beagle mix, incredibly intelligent and we've been gutted since. So many people came over who knew him and offered their sympathies - no kidding even his vet of 11 years cried because of his personality. I'm not even sure when my wife will recover.

He was 11.5 years old and this just happened like a light switch - up until 2 weeks ago he was his completely happy self, then the decline happened so quickly. It was cancer - it started on his liver and spleen and travelled to his lungs and brain, all within 6 months.

To everyone who has lost their pet - my sincere sympathies. I now know what it's like.

It’s like a fucking freight train hitting you. Cancer! WTF and why do so many our our fur children get it. In a way I’m glad my little Vegas didn’t suffer for very long. One day I noticed a lump over her eye and got a CT scan. The next day she was hospitalized with IV fluid because it invaded her TMJ and she couldn’t open her mouth. The biopsy came back as a Osteosarcoma and I knew right then it was a poor long term prognosis. I got so depressed that I didn’t get out bed for three days and had to cancel my own patients. Only people like us understand. Vegas got me through a nasty divorce, but she was there afterwards for the birth of my twins.

All I can say is it helps to talk about it. My wife and I still talk about the first two dogs we coexisted with. Now we have three dogs, but they are more of “family” dogs as they came after the birth of our kids. They are good, but as I said, Vegas was the best. My wife also agrees and says her Chloe was the best.

Sorry for your loss.