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04-24-2019, 02:31 PM | #1828 |
I'll get back to you
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2009 E90 N51 /Active Autowerke Stage 2 tune/BMW Performance Exhaust/ Countermeasure enthusiast. |
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04-24-2019, 02:37 PM | #1829 |
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I crop dusted the wife the other day and lied about it.
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04-24-2019, 11:31 PM | #1830 |
drunk poster
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I went to a dinner with some good friends and some friends of friends I barely knew. When we sat down I made it known that I wanted the table to sample a few bottles of a kind of wine I liked. Since they were kind of expensive I said I would pay for the bottles.
At the end of the night, one of the 'friends of friends' I barely knew was drunk and said once that he'd pay the ENTIRE bill. I let him do it without a fight. I wonder if he'll try to track me down tomorrow once he sobers up and realizes what he's done |
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04-26-2019, 11:56 AM | #1832 |
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so we just signed our lease for the summer and was looking at furniture, found something called a "cum bed" on clist
why tf is it called a "cum bed"? |
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04-26-2019, 12:15 PM | #1833 | |
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Quote:
Either way.....I think I would skip on that one!
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Everybody has a gameplan....until they get punched in the mouth.
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04-26-2019, 01:45 PM | #1835 | |
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Quote:
Or post a link. |
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04-26-2019, 01:46 PM | #1836 |
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My moped is running.
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04-26-2019, 06:06 PM | #1837 |
drunk poster
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04-26-2019, 06:08 PM | #1838 |
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I have horrendous protein farts and may lose my job and have to sleep in the garage
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04-26-2019, 10:08 PM | #1839 |
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Met a friend for dinner and beers tonight and, since Wifey was not there to give me the evil eye, had a ribeye and fries. And several IPAs.
Think a couple of Hail Mary's will get me forgiveness?
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04-26-2019, 11:23 PM | #1841 |
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04-27-2019, 01:11 PM | #1842 |
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A COUPLE of them. Not 1/4
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I have romped on her and I giggled like a drunk infant the entire time. - Sedan_Clan
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04-28-2019, 05:45 AM | #1843 |
dances with roads
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Maybe reciting the pope's phone number?
Confession: I'm not Catholic but I am divorced from one. (The second time around I married an Episcopalian.) |
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05-01-2019, 12:12 PM | #1845 |
Lieutenant General
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all morning i was eyeballing a spider, size of quarter.
I got busy with work, now i have no idea where spider is...lol Now i cant focus . |
05-01-2019, 12:14 PM | #1846 |
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05-01-2019, 12:45 PM | #1847 |
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05-01-2019, 12:58 PM | #1848 | |
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I was bitten by a Brown Recluse once. It was in one of my shoes in the garage that I used to slip on when I would walk out to the yard. Bit me on the ankle and ended up needing skin grafts in the end. Still have the scars. An old friend of mine who bought/sold exotic animals found out really quickly as he told me to look in a tank at his place one day. Inside was one of those bird eating spiders about the size of a dinner plate. I ran him straight over trying to get as much distance between me and it as I could. Almost broke his nose as I was flailing my arms while running!
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