online match maker - who has used one?

[3.0L]

Originally Posted by zx10guy

And this could happen with dating someone the "traditional" way. Don't see how those situations can be pinned solely on online dating. The unfortunate situation is there seems to be some pattern your friend has with selecting mates/partners that needs to be addressed.

There is some truth to what you state, but I still believe the so-called match-making stuff is a bit more risky than the traditional ways of meeting folks. My friend met his 3rd squeeze at church and they took it slow and easy. Unlike the online match-making deal, folks have a reputation, good or bad, in places like a church venue. And that reputation extends outside that venue and can be easily investigated. No?

[zx10guy]

Originally Posted by 3.0L

There is some truth to what you state, but I still believe the so-called match-making stuff is a bit more risky than the traditional ways of meeting folks. My friend met his 3rd squeeze at church and they took it slow and easy. Unlike the online match-making deal, folks have a reputation, good or bad, in places like a church venue. And that reputation extends outside that venue and can be easily investigated. No?

You'll find many of the same people doing the traditional method that are also online. I myself was surprised by the people I already know that I saw online as possible matches. People approach this whole online thing with so much bias and are quick to blame their problems with online dating on the actual medium. First, I chuckle when people complain that they can't find quality people on of all places Tinder. I didn't know much about online dating before I dove in and still knew Tinder was just a place to hook up.

As I've said in other posts, online dating is a tool. Your success is only going to be based on how you use it and what you put into it. I didn't put in a lot of work but I did put a little in with generating profile pics and a short and sweet intro. I read up a little on what makes a good profile and executed on some of it. I tried doing things the traditional way. I got tired of the pool of women that are in the social circles I frequent. Going online allowed me to branch out to a pool of women I would have never otherwise be exposed to.

I'm currently dating a lady that everything seems to just mesh. I met her on eHarmony. At the time I thought all the questions were just fluff but apparently there seems to be something to it.

As an aside, I met my ex wife through a mutual friend. Everyone thought she was a great person. Things changed drastically after we got married. To the tune that her best friend and maid of honor at our wedding are no longer best friends. A friend of hers that were friends way longer than when I was in the picture hardly recognizes her now. Said she's turned into a cold person. To summarize, I got royally screwed. But I've learned from this experience and didn't blame her for everything. I took an introspective look at myself to figure out my role in the mess. It was hard. But I feel pretty good that I won't fall into the same mistakes that I did before the divorce. I walked away from a few women through my online dating that I probably wouldn't have had I not done the work to improve myself.