Happy Mother's Day Thread

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Sara504

My Mother's Day keeps getting better and better.

Yesterday I had a dozen roses and chocolates delivered to my office. Since I am a single Mother and Scarlett is too young to make me a card, I honestly did not expect anything at all. It made me cry. They were from my older sister.

I was so excited about them that I posted the flowers on FB with a little message very similar to what I just wrote. My Mom stayed with me last night to baby sit Scarlett while I went out . This morning I wake up to a hand written Mother's Day Card and Scarlett's hand traced inside. Very sloppy but soooo cute and meaningful. (Every year I trace my hand in my Mother's birthday cards, I have been doing it all my life)

Scarlett also said her first words this morning. "Maaaameeeee! Maaammmaa. Mama. Mama" she kept babbling over and over to me. She started crawling this week too.

I cant stop crying happy tears.

A good support network is worth more than many spouses. I envy your relationship with your mom and I'm sure your daughter will appreciate the closeness you two have later. Happy mothers day Sara, and when things get tough (I'm telling you, do not teach her how to talk!!) do as I do and count the days until we can just kick them out.

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Billup

It was a terrible suggestion. I'm going to go on a whim and say the roofie in the tea wouldn't have made it a better suggestion, right?

Only a wee bit insane. Keeps life interesting. I could see some pretty interesting conversations happening between us at the bar.

At least you went the other way around, octopus to a beautiful lady. I went from a cute kid to..., still looking like a cute kid.

Lol that would probably have worked better than tea but sure, I bet we would have interesting conversations!

Beauty is overrated, Billup! Go after the ladies that look like shit and become a happy man.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by Lups

Lol that would probably have worked better than tea but sure, I bet we would have interesting conversations!

Beauty is overrated, Billup! Go after the ladies that look like shit and become a happy man.

Maybe one day we could grab a drink, would be quite the experience. lol

I'm way too shallow unfortunately. My standards are high in what I want in a woman, which is why I don't settle down with one, all the pretty ones I see are bat shit crazy and I can't handle that on a daily basis. Ladies that look like shit, make my wiener feel like shit, so that would just never work.

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Billup

Maybe one day we could grab a drink, would be quite the experience. lol

I'm way too shallow unfortunately. My standards are high in what I want in a woman, which is why I don't settle down with one, all the pretty ones I see are bat shit crazy and I can't handle that on a daily basis. Ladies that look like shit, make my wiener feel like shit, so that would just never work.

Hahaha, okay, maybe not like shit but someone who doesnt consider her only attribute to the world being how they look.

(I'd say that sentence is coming together better but that is not going to happen. Try making sense of it)

[Sara]

Originally Posted by Billup

Maybe one day we could grab a drink, would be quite the experience. lol

.

What youre really trying to say here is, you just wanna stick your wiener in her.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by Lups

Hahaha, okay, maybe not like shit but someone who doesnt consider her only attribute to the world being how they look.

(I'd say that sentence is coming together better but that is not going to happen. Try making sense of it)

Mmmmm, that's strange. I don't really know how I feel about that. I don't think I could be with someone unattractive to be completely honest. It's probably shallow, but I need to be excited about who I'm "seeing". I don't care to settle down, I have everything I could want right now, so all I need is some good sex. Ya feels me.

You made perfect sense, so no foul there. I'd rate that sentence a solid 8/10 on my English scale.

Originally Posted by Sara504

What youre really trying to say here is, you just wanna stick your wiener in her.

What I'm realllllllly trying to say is that I'd stick my wiener in both of you. Probably more than once, but I can't make any assumptions. Maybe all three of us should meet halfway..., so like.... Mississippi? Next week?

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Billup

Mmmmm, that's strange. I don't really know how I feel about that. I don't think I could be with someone unattractive to be completely honest. It's probably shallow, but I need to be excited about who I'm "seeing". I don't care to settle down, I have everything I could want right now, so all I need is some good sex. Ya feels me.

You made perfect sense, so no foul there. I'd rate that sentence a solid 8/10 on my English scale.



What I'm realllllllly trying to say is that I'd stick my wiener in both of you. Probably more than once, but I can't make any assumptions. Maybe all three of us should meet halfway..., so like.... Mississippi? Next week?

I read this before going to the dog park and I was going to write again looks really has never played any part when I've picked my partners but it's clearly bs.

I've always gone for the super geeks. All the men in my past share the same attributes: Super smart guys and I have no idea why the hell they've chosen to be with me. Also, they all have had the confidence that has made it clear from the start they know their value and a gym membership they use daily.

This all just made me realize I'm a complete hypocrite and I'm sorry. apparently even if I don't give s shit about how I look, I do care how you guys look.

Forget everything I said Billup!

[Taskmaster]

Originally Posted by Billup

Pffffffffffftttt, I HIGHLY doubt I'd go insane in your company. In fact, it's too bad there is so much distance between us, I'd love to take you out for crumpets and tea.

I wasn't sure what to get my mother this year. I ended up getting this picture put on a fleece blanket with Happy Mothers Day above it. She opened it the other day, I told her to return it because she broke gift rules. She still has it, I'm too far to do anything about it. Hmpf.

Spare your comments, I know I was adorable.

That your mom? ;-)

[Billup]

Originally Posted by Lups

I read this before going to the dog park and I was going to write again looks really has never played any part when I've picked my partners but it's clearly bs.

I've always gone for the super geeks. All the men in my past share the same attributes: Super smart guys and I have no idea why the hell they've chosen to be with me. Also, they all have had the confidence that has made it clear from the start they know their value and a gym membership they use daily.

This all just made me realize I'm a complete hypocrite and I'm sorry. apparently even if I don't give s shit about how I look, I do care how you guys look.

Forget everything I said Billup!

Anyone who says looks doesn't matter is a liar. Everyone has preferences, some more extreme than others, but that's human instinct. I mean, lets be honest, I'm much happier working harder to score with better looking women, than the poor guys who will nail whatever walks with a twat. It's like having a trophy room filled with a bunch of trophies just for participating, but never actually accomplishing anything.

You are a hypocrite, but you're the best kind of hypocrite.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by TheAxiom

That your mom? ;-)

That's Frebbie, errr Frebs. AKA "mom".

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Billup

Anyone who says looks doesn't matter is a liar. Everyone has preferences, some more extreme than others, but that's human instinct. I mean, lets be honest, I'm much happier working harder to score with better looking women, than the poor guys who will nail whatever walks with a twat. It's like having a trophy room filled with a bunch of trophies just for participating, but never actually accomplishing anything.

You are a hypocrite, but you're the best kind of hypocrite.

Lol .

In my defense I be always preferred the wild world of IRC as my tool to pray on the innocent men. I've really had no idea what they looked like. It has been the damn attitude that has always drawn me in.

Still, what a load of bs from me again.

[V1.47fan]

Originally Posted by TheAxiom

That your mom? ;-)

Easy there, Shitbreak Finch.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by Lups

Lol .

In my defense I be always preferred the wild world of IRC as my tool to pray on the innocent men. I've really had no idea what they looked like. It has been the damn attitude that has always drawn me in.

Still, what a load of bs from me again.

That's where you and I differ. Unless someone TRULY knows me, half the shit I say over message could be misinterpreted rather quickly, and usually is. I used to find myself having to censor what I said, and that's totally not cool.

Most of my hunting is done IRL. Target is a honey hole for women, so is Starbucks. I don't really like Starbucks, but women do. Bars are so-so, I usually end up getting plastered and end up having too much fun to chase women, that and my hearing sucks, so they get confused when I yell at them.

[V1.47fan]

Originally Posted by Billup

That's where you and I differ. Unless someone TRULY knows me, half the shit I say over message could be misinterpreted rather quickly, and usually is. I used to find myself having to censor what I said, and that's totally not cool.

Most of my hunting is done IRL. Target is a honey hole for women, so is Starbucks. I don't really like Starbucks, but women do. Bars are so-so, I usually end up getting plastered and end up having too much fun to chase women, that and my hearing sucks, so they get confused when I yell at them.

How about walmart?

[Billup]

Originally Posted by V1.47fan

How about walmart?

I can't believe I forgot to mention the Walmarts. Only the classiest of classy can shop there since their prices are so damn high.

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by V1.47fan

How about walmart?

Theres some hot babes there:

[Lups]

Originally Posted by Billup

That's where you and I differ. Unless someone TRULY knows me, half the shit I say over message could be misinterpreted rather quickly, and usually is. I used to find myself having to censor what I said, and that's totally not cool.

Most of my hunting is done IRL. Target is a honey hole for women, so is Starbucks. I don't really like Starbucks, but women do. Bars are so-so, I usually end up getting plastered and end up having too much fun to chase women, that and my hearing sucks, so they get confused when I yell at them.

I end up hating men in fife minutes max irl. Way too fast for them to have any hope at all. The ones I was interested I friend zoned effectively. If it had been up to me I never would've had a relationship in my life and the two men I've taken home to meet the daddy, first one got dumped in a week after because my mother all but drooled on him.

With this track record I should never ever say a thing to anyone about relationships.

I agree with the guys, your mom is a beautiful woman. I can't wait the time to come when you post pics of Billup juniors.

[Billup]

Originally Posted by Lups

I end up hating men in fife minutes max irl. Way too fast for them to have any hope at all. The ones I was interested I friend zoned effectively. If it had been up to me I never would've had a relationship in my life and the two men I've taken home to meet the daddy, first one got dumped in a week after because my mother all but drooled on him.

With this track record I should never ever say a thing to anyone about relationships.

I agree with the guys, your mom is a beautiful woman. I can't wait the time to come when you post pics of Billup juniors.

Hahaha, poor fellas. You should at least give them an hour or two to build their hopes up before you strip it away. Much more gratifying that way.

Please, if track records determine the worth of an opinion, then basically anything that leaves my mouth or keyboard is complete shit. Just gotta own it and embrace it.

It will probably be a while. As much as I love kids, I can't think of a woman worthy of my seed right now. I mean, they'd be good as a carrier, but that's it.

[Taskmaster]

Originally Posted by V1.47fan

Easy there, Shitbreak Finch.

[Lups]

I just got a mothers day card and though this is not as traditional as the card Sara got, the text is epic.

Just me and my mom:

We like to: Go to the dog park.
She works hard at: Taking care of us. (not true but hell if I correct the pup)
We spend a lot of time: Walking the dogs in a dog park.
She loves: animals.
My favorite food is: Bacon with pasta. (bacon pasta is the easiest and by far the tastiest food you can make under 20minutes time).
She cooks the best: Bacon with pasta.
We are really good at: Making mistakes.
She likes it when I: Help with the dishes.
We don't like: Dog poop on the carpet (we have a puppy)
Her favorite hobby is: Playing games
When it's just us we: Like to go to car wash ( this bit killed me completely)
I love mom because: She makes my nightmares go away. ("I wrote first because she lets me get information on stuff school thinks I'm too young to know but the teacher said that is not a nice thing")

Washing cars in mothers day card! Beat that guys.

[V1.47fan]

Originally Posted by TheAxiom

[Captain Blood]

To the moms on here, keep doing what you're doing!