LOL Pic Thread (NO POLITICS)

Dpc2u · 09-05-2020, 09:43 PM

..

KRS_SN · 09-06-2020, 05:35 AM

*Consulting Humour*

Last Friday, I took a guest to Sagar Ratna Restaurant. I noticed that the waiter had a spoon in his shirt pocket.

I looked around and saw all the waiters had spoons in their pockets.

When the waiter came I inquired, "Why do you place the spoon in your pocket?"

He explained, "The boss hired Accenture Consulting to reengineer our processes. They discovered the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. Approximately 3 spoons per table per hour are dropped. If our staff carry spoons, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift."

As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he replaced it with his spare one.

"I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now."

I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the Indian waiter's zip. Looking around, I saw that all of the Indian waiters had the same string hanging from their zips. I asked the waiter, "Excuse me, can you tell me why you have that string there?"

Then the Indian waiter lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so observant. Accenture also suggested we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of our manhood, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 45%."

I asked quietly, "After you get it out, how do you put it back?"

He whispered, "Accenture didn't mention that in report, so, _We use the spoon_."

KRS_SN · 09-06-2020, 07:39 AM

b

haagm58 · 09-06-2020, 09:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by KRS_SN

b

Said the husband to his wife

The Choosey begger · 09-06-2020, 09:34 AM

;n

Murf993 · 09-06-2020, 11:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by anglo

;n

That reminds me of a story told to my by a friend in Canada's Airborne Regiment about Somalia......I'll leave it at that.

unluky · 09-06-2020, 12:20 PM

m

Murf993 · 09-06-2020, 06:02 PM

I can't stop watching this....

KRS_SN · 09-06-2020, 06:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Murf993

I can't stop watching this....

I've once tried something like that in high school to impress the girls. someone set up a stage lined up 7 tiles one in top of the other and poured kerosene on them and asked if anyone brave could come up to the stage and break them tiles.
I did volunteer.
Next thing I know the tiles were broken but my arm was on fire.
Forget the girls i couldn't even wank for a week as my hand and arm hurt so bad and was blistered up.

vreihen16 · 09-06-2020, 06:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Murf993

That reminds me of a story told to my by a friend in Canada's Airborne Regiment about Somalia......I'll leave it at that.

They got the Piper Cub flying again?????

Dpc2u · 09-06-2020, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Murf993

I can't stop watching this....

That is beautiful!

:

wcr3d · 09-06-2020, 07:15 PM

The poster child for dumb ass, that is great!

Murf993 · 09-06-2020, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by vreihen16

They got the Piper Cub flying again?????

Our military is under funded and under equipped but have produced some fine fighting units including the Airborne which were disbanded after Somalia, something wrong with sending a hardened group of Commando's on a peace keeping mission. But point taken, and I'd tell the story but some may find it offensive.

Noneya · 09-06-2020, 09:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Murf993

Our military is under funded and under equipped ...

Shouldn't this be in the joke thread?

The Choosey begger · 09-07-2020, 01:15 PM

-g

The Choosey begger · 09-07-2020, 01:16 PM

<

StripclubDJ · 09-07-2020, 02:04 PM

.

Murf993 · 09-08-2020, 07:17 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wcr3d

The poster child for dumb ass, that is great!

You can't fix stupid, but apparently you can light it on fire.

wcr3d · 09-08-2020, 09:06 AM

True but I get a strange satisfaction when it happens.
Karma

ramman434 · 09-08-2020, 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MKSixer

Progress?

Call me nostalgic, but I miss the good ole days

unluky · 09-08-2020, 05:15 PM

i

rwheels · 09-08-2020, 07:03 PM

What would you do for 200 bucks?

09-05-2020, 09:43 PM	#27985
Dpc2u Major 11486 Rep 1,065 Posts Drives: E93 M3, E60 M5, F15 X5, E46 Join Date: Feb 2019 Location: Middle Tennessee iTrader: (0)	.. Attached Images __________________ E46, E60 M5, E93 M3, F15 X5 IG - @thebimmerhaus
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09-06-2020, 05:35 AM	#27986
KRS_SN Major General 14198 Rep 5,383 Posts Drives: IX,G07 Join Date: Oct 2018 Location: Glasgow iTrader: (0) Garage List 2020 X7 [10.00] X5 [9.25] IX [8.67]	Consulting Humour Last Friday, I took a guest to Sagar Ratna Restaurant. I noticed that the waiter had a spoon in his shirt pocket. I looked around and saw all the waiters had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter came I inquired, "Why do you place the spoon in your pocket?" He explained, "The boss hired Accenture Consulting to reengineer our processes. They discovered the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. Approximately 3 spoons per table per hour are dropped. If our staff carry spoons, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift." As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he replaced it with his spare one. "I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now." I was impressed. I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the Indian waiter's zip. Looking around, I saw that all of the Indian waiters had the same string hanging from their zips. I asked the waiter, "Excuse me, can you tell me why you have that string there?" Then the Indian waiter lowered his voice. "Not everyone is so observant. Accenture also suggested we can save time in the restroom. By tying this string to the tip of our manhood, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 45%." I asked quietly, "After you get it out, how do you put it back?" He whispered, "Accenture didn't mention that in report, so, _We use the spoon_."
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09-06-2020, 07:39 AM	#27987
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09-06-2020, 09:34 AM	#27989
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09-06-2020, 12:20 PM	#27991
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09-06-2020, 06:02 PM	#27992
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09-06-2020, 07:15 PM	#27996
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09-07-2020, 01:15 PM	#27999
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09-07-2020, 01:16 PM	#28000
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09-07-2020, 02:04 PM	#28001
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09-08-2020, 09:06 AM	#28003
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09-08-2020, 05:15 PM	#28005
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09-08-2020, 07:03 PM	#28006
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