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Keep in mind that the abuse to cars comes mainly from accelerating and braking aggressively, frequently, and very hard. If you dial it down to 9/10ths, and focus on very smooth, effecient lines in hte corners, and mount good rubber, you can still hit fast times and have a ton of fun and learn a lot without beating the crap out of your car.
I remember this from motorcycles having a 600cc bike and easily keeping up with 1000cc machines just with corner speed, better lines, later, smoother braking and getting back on the throttle sooner and smoother.
You'll probably find that very experienced and skilled test drivers, really don't beat up the cars that much and being smooth, but deliberate, results in faster lap times.
SO maybe short shift a little, focus on perfect lines and corner speed and still have fun without ending up in the garage. Remember, the guys that really push it will have modified cars and are willing the break things.
If your not willing to break things, check your ego at the door and just drive smoother and have fun.
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