Quote:
Originally Posted by mjr24
Yep, same here with me. I have an 11-year old now who I obviously love a lot....but I only had known the girl a month when it happened (I fell for the whole "I'm on birth control" bit). However, his mother has been an absolute piece of work from the day she told me about the pregnancy....and, trust me, she is one of those who continues to frequently cause problems even though it's been 10 years since we've dated.
I was 26 years old....had money...had nothing tying me down...and got caught up. I swore that I was too smart for that to ever happen to me. However, money sometimes attracts evil people with ulterior motives.
It's not just the money it costs in child support (that ultimately doesn't even go to the child), etc.....but it was the loss of independence and freedom. You can't just get up and move across the country anymore, etc.
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You are exactly right! The financial end, although difficult, is only one part of the equation. In my situation, I would have paid double the child support just to be able to have been able to spend more time with my boys. She was always concerned money while I was concerned about lost time with my children. Seems that our priorities always fall onto what it is that we don't have. It makes me proud that my boys now see and understand what was really going on versus the bullshit they were fed. Although she is their mother and they love her, they see how she used them then and continues to do so now. The best advice I can give anyone is never to say anything demeaning about the other parent to your children, you'll only lose credibility with them. Kids are smart and they eventually see it for themselves.